This week I have just commenced a spell of work experience with Derek Acorah. After taking a serious look at where my life was going (nowhere) I decided to quit my boring old administration job, and have started pursuing my dream of becoming a medium (sorry mum). Derek has kindly decided to let me join him on the road, on the condition that I help facilitate his extensive sexual needs. First stop STOCKPORT.
Derek having a laugh while signing a giant picture of himself. The laughter soon stopped when an unkempt member of the audience deliberately popped his scrotum out of the fly of a soiled pair ASDA George jeans. Luckily security intercepted him before he could reach Derek. While he is a dab hand when it comes to shape shifters, Derek goes to bits when confronted by your common or garden cretinous pervert.
Somehow this 'character' got backstage after the Stockport show. This picture doesn't adequately convey how terribly awkward this whole scenario was. When Geller managed to warp Derek's special fromage frais spoon beyond all repair, the atmosphere was irreparably spoiled for the evening. Security really dropped the ball this time.
Seeing how much gash Derek gets on tour has been a real eye-opener. Apparently the bird in the pastel blue sports jacket is "a nasty piece of work in the sack."
Then again, Derek said the exact same thing about this guy. I think he says that about everyone.
Here's Derek enjoying a rare quiet moment in Little Chef. Apparently nothing helps keep 'the other side' at bay like scampi and chips.
This is the scene that greeted us as we pulled up outside the Bury Community College main hall. Before exiting our Toyota minivan Derek mopped the perspiration from his brow with the cuff of his jacket, smiled to himself, and muttered "playtime is over ladies, playtime is over."
Derek having a laugh while signing a giant picture of himself. The laughter soon stopped when an unkempt member of the audience deliberately popped his scrotum out of the fly of a soiled pair ASDA George jeans. Luckily security intercepted him before he could reach Derek. While he is a dab hand when it comes to shape shifters, Derek goes to bits when confronted by your common or garden cretinous pervert.
Somehow this 'character' got backstage after the Stockport show. This picture doesn't adequately convey how terribly awkward this whole scenario was. When Geller managed to warp Derek's special fromage frais spoon beyond all repair, the atmosphere was irreparably spoiled for the evening. Security really dropped the ball this time.
Seeing how much gash Derek gets on tour has been a real eye-opener. Apparently the bird in the pastel blue sports jacket is "a nasty piece of work in the sack."
Then again, Derek said the exact same thing about this guy. I think he says that about everyone.
Here's Derek enjoying a rare quiet moment in Little Chef. Apparently nothing helps keep 'the other side' at bay like scampi and chips.
This is the scene that greeted us as we pulled up outside the Bury Community College main hall. Before exiting our Toyota minivan Derek mopped the perspiration from his brow with the cuff of his jacket, smiled to himself, and muttered "playtime is over ladies, playtime is over."
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