Can you turn a Suit into a Style Icon?

Evidently the answer is no.

The Max Hastings makeover is reasonably inoffensive. He just looks like a mildly senile/daft grandad whose grandchildren have taken him on a humorous shopping trip to Topman.

Things start to take a slightly sinister turn when we get to Ken Livingstone. With his undone tie and open-legged stance, Ken is giving off a massive pre-coital vibe. All that's missing from this picture is a Rophynol laden Gin and Tonic for Ken's ladyguest. If she has any wits about her she will have already booked her minicab home.

Something about Jeremy Vine's facial expression is rubbing me up the wrong way, making me want to smash his house up. He's been dressed as a Graphic Designer residing in Dalston, but has completely missed the point and is gurning like a cartoon skinhead.

This is my favourite, as John Torode just looks proper mental. It's remarkable how they have managed to achieve such a litany of hideous mistakes on one man:

- The baffling 'blissed-out nonce' facial expression that Torode is pulling. It looks like he has spent the shoot getting smashed on Ken's addled Gin and Tonics.
- He is wearing 2 watches. One of which isn't even a real watch.
- His Finger nails are painted black, thus accentuating the powerful nonce vibes that this picture emits.
- He is nonchalantly balancing a guitar on his knee; looking like he's ready to break into a 45-minute Suzanne Vega medley.
- Men with womanly hips freak me out, and Torode is sporting a pair of rolled up brown slacks that reveal a vintage lady bum.
- Disgusting Orange suede loafers/pixie shoes sans socks.

Someone at Observer Woman obviously hates paunchy middle-aged men, and has gone to great pains to make them look like proper cunts. Mission accomplished.